I came out as bisexual when I was 13 in health class at school. I was really lucky to have been pretty easily accepted at school, particularly quite young and in a Presbyterian setting, and it was all very chill. I had queer friends, more as I got older. I was originally pretty strong in my identification as a woman, hardcore girl power, but when I started uni and started studying sociology a lot of the literature regarding gender and social construction and such tipped me into gender crisis mood and after a while I kinda settled on confusing label somewhere along the line of non-binary, genderqueer, femme, but I think internalised transphobia for me really wanted to avoid the non-binary trans identity.
I'm still kinda working through it but don't really identify with a gender and I am happy with that, queer is my description of choice. A lot of the spaces I am in don't feel, not unsafe per se, but not comfortable using they/them pronouns strictly so I offer she/they pronouns generally. I am still working through gender stuff and currently being in with a cisgender heterosexual male partner is quite strange and somewhat threatens to hide that identity but it's a constant thing I'm constantly exploring.
I was originally pretty strong in my identification as a woman, hardcore girl power
I came out to my mum at the GP with someone else present which made it a lot more comfortable for me, and I made it clear that while I wanted her to know I wasn't really wanting to DISCUSS it with her. setting limitations if there are spaces in which or people to whom you're not out to keep you safe. there is no rush, you must feel safe and ready particularly if your family relationship and space is important to you.
reach out in queer spaces, events, even though its initially terrifying you can make it known to people that you are in fact terrified and someone will adopt you. online resources and connections are really helpful and affirming.
